LAMBERTO GARCIA DEL CID
ESCRITOR
Stories for Strange Times
This book is composed of short stories that have in common a component of weirdness or strangeness not entirely attributable to our times, but who knows. This share of the exceptional, the surprising, the weird, provides a link that makes them fit into the title.
Zen for Dummies
The beautiful nonsense sayings in clothes of anti-reason, the koans, are for me the biggest attraction of Zen. However, my readings of texts about Zen philosophy have taught me that koans, being the most attractive part of this peculiar subject, is the less abundant. With the idea of making the most entertaining and instructive part of Zen wisdom accessible to readers like myself, I have collected all the dialogues, riddles and paradoxical phrases I've found in the many books that I've read about Zen and surrounding areas and I have written them down in a simply way, avoiding metaphysical adornments. The result, gentle reader, is this book that you have in your hands.
Some opinions about this books:
National Rifle Congregation: “I have not understood a word of what the author wants to transmit. A philosophy made of stupid riddles and anecdotes for democrat morons? Both author and book need a good shot”.
Sacramento Temple of the Sacred Buddha: “A Book that must be worshipped as the best path towards Enlightenment”.
Dummy Association of America and Texas: “A very recommendable book for sleepless people. Our chairman read it and says the book is about Zen”.
Instructions to Jump into the Void
This book is made of notes and digressions, not just intending to rub the reader with the perpetual error of the human fate, but as a warning that we stand on the verge of rationality and a few steps further in the current direction, and despite the constant forewarnings of illustrious minds, we’ll fall into the abyss of irrationality. These notes, aphorisms or long diatribes (according to the patience of the reader), apart from their admonitory nature, include a considerable part of personal relief. Also, I confess, they try to perpetuate the spirit of those pessimistic thinkers that according to mood, or luck, have walked into my reading’s path. Without being longwinded, I will name some authors that have inspired me: Arthur Schopenhauer, Friedrich Nietzsche, Pío Baroja, Miguel de Unamuno, Mark Twain, Paul Krassner, Karlheinz Deschner, Johnathan Swift, E. M. Cioran.
It is not that I want to compare myself with such mandarins of the literature in terms of the gifts received by the muses, but I share the sour of their sight, their militant pessimism, in agreeing with their cruel vision of the petulant creature that receives the name of "human being". This book avoids discursive modalities in rattle prose, this book wants to remind the reader that he carries, from boyhood, a skull inside, this book is written to calm down my obsessions, my angry moods, my hostility against the selfish citizens that are all around me.
Opinions on this Book:
“Belligerent, virulent, ruthless, a book that will wake you up, or make you cry. Recommendable”. (Abbie Hoffman Jr.)
“I would have liked to have written it myself. But it is not too late to, hand in hand, join Lamberto in his jump into the void”. (Paula Krassner)
“A books that deserved to be burned. Blasphemous, irreverent in excess, its author will jump into Hell without any doubt”. (Reverend Joshua McCarthy)
Teachings of the Wise Turtle
This book is composed of maxims, aphorisms and short stories supposedly said by a Wise Turtle that lived many centuries ago. The pretext for this work is explained in the preface: “Modern zoologists have found in various plants and logs a rudimentary language which is believed to reflect the teachings of a being repeatedly referred to as the Wise Turtle. This specimen is assumed to be revered by nearly all chelonians and is credited with a vast amount of teachings in the form of aphorisms and uplifting stories. However, recent studies show that the original thoughts of the Wise Turtle are but a few, being the main part of them added by his disciples and hagiographers”. The stories and sentences imitate those of the Far Eastern legends and Buddhist teachings.
What some media have said about this book:
Washington Chronicle: “An amusing book full of amusing stories written in an oriental style. Turtles are revealed here as very wise animals. Remarkable and recommendable”.
◙ Texan Rifle Club Bulletin: “A crap of a book, a pure shit, a waste of ink or whatever has been used to write it. I recommend the author not to come near our headquarters. Not at a shoot range, anyway”.
◙ Annals of Zoology: “A new vision of the Chelonian realm, an accurate revelation of the intelligence of these slow and patient animals”.
◙ The Village Voice: “An excellent book. The short and moralistic stories, however being mostly taken from Eastern traditions, are well brought into a supposed Chelonian world, which provides them with an exotic background”.
(Obviamente se refiere a la versión inglesa del libro: Teachings of the Wise Turtle)
